Gestures and Greetings of the Arabs

In the arab culture, gestures and greetings are important part of social life. It is a norm for every man to acknowledge the presence of every person within your space. Unlike in the Philippines or most western culture that i know where a simple nod is enough as a greeting, it is necessary to say "Assalamalaikum" or give a hand shake even in informal situations. They never runout of standard phrases to sayeverytime they meet a person even let say they have met the person a while ago.

Here are some of the important phrases and gestures that they say and do:

Assalamalaikum- the english translation of this is "peace e upon you". Although this is a Muslim greeting, this phrase is embedded in the Arab culture. It is commonly said to a person you just see or an introduction in every phone call.

Kef halek- this means how are you. A standard phrase after assalamalaikum. But i've noticed that they just don't consider the person they're talking with but also they ask how's everyone in the family,friends etc.

Jazak allah kheir- translated as "may God reward you" in english. A phrase commonly say after a thank you or "shukran". This may also mean thank you but saying after thank you emphasizes the meaning.

Yatik al affiyah- "may God give you strength". I often hear this during as a closing remark like saying goodbye or even just seeing a person.

Putting a hand in the chest- this is a commond gesture which means that it is a pleasure meeting a person after a greeting.

Kissing in the cheek- i find it very awkward the first time i saw a man kissing another man in the cheek. It is one of the few things i've noticed when i arrived in Saudi Arabia the first time. It is common norm throughout the arab world to kiss a friend or a family in thr cheek. However this is only true for the same sex. A man kissing a woman who is not a close relative is hardly acceptable. I also noticed that there is a standard way of performing this (i've secretly studied the technique everyitme a situation.

Pilipino Ako! Pero.

Masarap maging Pinoy. Maabilidad, matalino, masigasig, matiyaga at masipag. Pero sa kabila nito. May mga bagay na dapat siguro na isantabi na natin. Mga bagay na humahadlang sa atin para marating talaga ang tunay na ibig sabihin ng Galing ng Pilipino.

Sadya kong isinulat ang post na ito sa salitang tanging Pinoy lang ang makakaintindi. Para lubos nating maunawaan ang ating mga kakulangan. Kumbaga "Usapang Pamilya lang." Ang layunin ko ay para harapin ang katotohanan na meron talaga tayong problema sa ating kinagisnan at marahil sa ating kultura na dapat na natin iwanan o di kaya kalimutan na lang. Katulad ng mga sumusunod.

Pakikisama. Sa papaanong paraan nga ba ang tamang pakikisama? Pakikisama para saan? Sama sama sa pag unlad? Sama sama din ba tayong maghihirap? Ang Pinoy likas na matulungin. Pero minsan sa ang pagtulong natin sa kapwa, may hinahanap na kapalit. Kahit sa maling paraan. Halimbawa may humingi ng pabor sa isang tao, madalas may inaasahan tayong kapalit sa pagtulong na kahit sa maling paraan o panahon ay hihingin natin ito sa taong tinulungan dahil sa konsepto ng "Utang na loob" na kapag tumanggi ka na tumulong, sasabihin sa'yo wala kang pakisama. Kahit na ang hinihingi sayong pabor kapalit ng tulong ay ang paggawa ng maling bagay. Madalas ito sa pulitika. Kaya nga marami tayong nahahalal na pinuno kahit hindi naman sapat ang abilidad para mamuno. Kasi nahalal lang dahil sa pakikisama.

Malapit sa Pamilya. Hindi ko naman sinasabing masama ito. Pero may ilang mga bagay na naglalagay sa atin sa kapahamakan dahil na rin sa Pamilya. Mga taong ikinukubli o di kaya'y kinukunsinti ang maling gawain ng kapamilya kasi pamilya nga eh. Dapat ipagtanggol. Pero ipagtanggol sa maling paraan. Kaya nga sa Pilipinas maraming political dynasty. Kasi kinunsinti din natin na magkaroon ng mga ganito. Hinayaan natin na may maluklok sa posisyon kahit hindi naman para sa bayan ang interes.

Talangka. Hindi ko alam kung bakit sa atin pa napunta ang ganitong kaisipan. Maiuugnay din natin ito sa pakikisama. Sa isang banda naisip ko kaya siguro natin hinahatak ang isang taong umaangat kasi gusto natin pantay pantay tayo. Walang lamangan. Kung saan yung isa, doon dapat lahat. Inggit. Maling pakikisama.

Regionalism. Hindi ko alam kung ano ang tamang salita sa Tagalog dito. Pero naitatanong ko rin to palagi sa isip ko. Bakit sa Pinas magawi ka lang sa norte iba na ang salita. Bakit ang tao kapag tinawag na bisaya (aminin natin ang realidad) baduy o di kaya katulong. Si Inday o si Dodong. Siguro dala na rin ng pagkakalayo layo ng mga isla sa Pinas kung bakit hindi tayo magkasundu-sundo. Kung bakit iba iba tayo ng paniniwala. Dito rin lumalabas ang pagiging racist natin. Ang Pinoy kapag nakakarinig ng biro galing sa ibang bansa umaangal agad. Pero bakit tayo may mga tawag din tayo sa ibang lahi. Halimbawa na lang sa mga Indians ang tawag natin bumbay na nagpa 5-6 at nagbebenta ng payong at kumot.

"Bakit kapag nagsalita ka ng ingles sasabihin sayo sosyal o trying hard o di kaya call center agent?" Samantalang natural naman sa Pinoy ang magsalita ng English. Tayo nga lang yata ang may ganitong salita sa asya. Dito tayo angat kaya hindi dapat iniisip ang mali sa pagsasalita ng ingles.

Sa bandang huli Pilipino pa rin tayo. Palagi nating sinasabi "Proud to be Pinoy". Ayaw nating na mababa ang tingin sa atin ng ibang tao. Pero naitanong ba natin sa mga sarili natin kung nararapat ba talaga tayong ipagmalaki ang sarili natin? Masayang maging Pinoy pero masmainam kung maitatakwil na natin yung mga ganitong kaisipan na humahatak sa atin pababa. Parang talangka...

What a life?

Days really fly so fast. I will be celebrating my birthdays after two weeks and I'm not getting any younger at twenty five. So what's in an age? It has been always a mind boggling topic for me to come and think about how people age and how it materializes into steps in life where you find your fate unpredictable. I always look up to something whenever i get older. I start to realize the things that I have, the things I've made, and my plans for the future. Suddenly, I am a bit scared with a feeling of being challenged on how I grasp life.

I am young. And this has been a fact for so many years that I try so hard to avoid thinking about how my life would be ten or twenty years from now. However, it is really an obsession of my mind to analyze the life of other people and reflect myself through it. Whenever I meet or hear a story about a person, I begin to seek interesting details about life. The bachelor years, career, marriage, family, children, etc. And all of these things I delineate in my mind a timeframe of a person's life. In order for me to analyze in a more tangible way.

Most of the people I look after to are the professionals or I'd rather say career-oriented people. Because it seems to be a realistic manifestation of a good life (in my opinion). However I also see life of common people. Based on what I saw, most people who chose to concentrate on their career had much chances of getting a stable life. Since most of them tend not to get married right away. A life being single. Where most of the chances are visible without any hesitation. A life with no strings attached where you have enough time and freedom to take the best opportunities. More time being you and building yourself for the better until you finally giving up all these for the family. This is one way of how I visualize life into a perspective. But nevertheless, you can't really perfect life nor predict what will happen afterwards.

The Down Syndrome

I really don't know what I am feeling right now. I'm always attacked by the feeling of insecurity and there's no way i can find to cure it. It's more like a cardiac arrest and maybe writing this may help to outburst the pain I am experiencing.

It was a good start today at work. Just got a fairly good cheer from my co-workers. But end up really unwell because of unpredicted situation i wasn't able to handle. I am the project manager of a construction site and I find it really challenging for my career to have an opportunity like this. Considering I am still in the inception of the industry. It is a small project though I am in charge of everything from planning and design up to the supervision and quality inspection. Beside me handling this project is Kudur, a Syrian sidekick working for my Arab boss for almost twelve years and Shaheen, a Pakistani working as a freelance electrician for almost ten years. It was a "Good Group" as my boss said and indeed it was. And to come and think about it, I am really proud that though being a newbie, I was given a good break for the start seeing the importance of my position regardless of the few experience I've had.

We had a good deal and a smooth sailing workflow. However, I am quite reluctant and skeptical about the stability and my situation being the head of the Project team. Maybe because of the inferiority complex that suddenly kills me. It starts when my boss seeks for the report of Kudur regarding the project situation. Since Kudur has worked for my boss for a long time, he has already gained the trust of my boss to all the business transactions including some personal errands of my boss, Kudur is always there. Most of the time I felt like i was "left behind". Perhaps because I am young, or maybe I don't know arabic which is practically the language used since most of the people here don't speak and understand English.

Can't really do anything to stop this anxiety at the moment. I hope it will just be frozen in oblivion.